Sunday, August 8, 2010

3.02 - A story about toasting to help and toasting to separation...

Hey lambs!

How are you? It's Sunday afternoon, almost early evening and I'm blogging over a glass of Crown and Redbull hot off a night of chilling with my good friend Andrew and a converstation with my salon peer Janelle.

I absolutely adore both of them to pieces and have come to the conclusion that they are two of my rocks in life as we speak. They both have been there and I sometimes take for granted the advice given from my friends and peers that want the absolute best for me. Andrew has stepped up to the plate as an amazing person and great friend to me. It's sometimes very hard for me to accept alot of what I hear when a friend has to throw a smackdown on me and last night was one of those nights.

I was not entirely in the mood for a heart to heart conversation, but was presented with alot of very tangible reasons for always feeling sadness over people that shouldn't really matter.

I remember hearing, "you are and become like those that you hang around with." And recently, I've had to make some adjustments. I've chosen to separate from a couple people that I claimed were my mainstays in life. One person, I have alot of history with, one, only months of history with..

I think the highest of both of them in regards to their talents artistically and in their businesses, but feel it's time to move on and separate from the pair of them until I'm contacted by either. Which means, it could or maybe could not happen.

Alot of guidance has come from a trusted couple of friends and my mum and last night, I had to let it all soak in as Andrew and I enjoyed an evening at the opening of a new bar, 3Below.

3Below has been opened by two of my clients and one of my cousins/god-brother. I'm very excited to tell you how impressed I was and how extremely proud I have of the three. I felt relaxed and safe and had a great time sipping cocktails and order the signature 3Below shot in a test tube... ha ha!

Recently, to pre-occupy my time, I've taken interest in mentoring a fellow stylist. We have a photoshoot planned for her and styling session. We're "remaking" or "refining" her image and I'm building a budding new frienship in the process..

My plans of opening my own salon are still in the works, but focusing my attention on Trendsetters and re-working my book are my passions in the meantime. I went apartment hunting and think I found a spot for possible move in in September after my birthday.

I need to take the time to focus on Josh, which means, my own place, no more Casa de Cooley or Panda's loft. Mine. Joshua Ryan, Inc. is in full swing. I need to get that going, get moved in and perhaps even work on a new car and letting life weed itself out. So, for the remainder of 2010, Pretty Boy Education and my self-promotion at Trendsetters will pre-occupy my time and I'll re-evalutate salon plans in early 2011 for possible work in 2012 as I've always said.

I've also got to acknowledge and thank the guidance of my good friend Andrew and my peers Janelle and Julie and my heart to heart with my mum.

My mum and I had a heart to heart the other night about me leaving the house and really establishing my identity.

Nothing has ever changed about me. I have always accepted that I like to have cocktail hour, walk around downtown sipping coffee and smoke a cigarette while discussing art, sex, spirituality and anything deep late at night with a mixed group of friends. Blogging is a huge outlet for me and when people tell me not to blog or tell me that they are offended by the content, it really doesn't matter to me.

The reason being, 9 out of 10 of you tell me how much you LOVE the blog and 1 out of 10 of you tell me that you were offended or felt slighted. All I can say is, I have never written about anything that isn't true or anything we haven't discussed.

Andrew reassured me last night that I have my balls in the right place and need to start thinking with them and stop worrying about what my misguided heart is telling me at the moment. My logic has to judge what's going on and not what others are saying about me, twittering or texting about me.

One thing I've learned is that those close to us that have gotten to know us intimately that do not stand up for us are ususally working against us somewhere with someone evil or envious.

So, it's time to stand up, put on my big boy couture trunks and walk away and focus on Josh Cooley: the person. Not the lover, not the business man, not the blogger- the person!

Because without me being a solid person, I cannot be solid in any of those fields. One reliable attribute I have is business, so we don't have to worry about that, but one questionable and imbalanced part of me is my choice of relationships and acquaintances and that has to end NOW. Not tomorrow, not next week...

My birthday's around the corner and I know I'm not going to have well-wishes or cocktails with a few on my heart's guest list this year and that's okay. I raise a glass to my self and toast my separation from negative people and toxic relations and toast to my good friends Andrew and Janelle for helping me realize that we all need an intervention and guidance from good friends.

When we don't want help, is generally, when we need the most.

Shavua tov,

Dedicated to Andrew. You mean so much to me... ; )

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