Monday, August 30, 2010

3.08 - A story about a less-than-happy birthday.

Good morning lambs,

It's 10:45 am on August 30th. Today is, in fact, my birthday and I'm sitting here alone at Casa de Cooley sipping a coffee getting ready to clean house ..

How glamourous.

I was greeted by some wonderful messages via Facebook and text this morning and could see how wonderful people really are. I am truly very blessed. I was kinda hoping I'd get a surprise text from Nasia, but no...

And I don't want anything from Leon even though I spent alot of time and effort on his birthday and hooked him up with D&G and a kick-ass watch..

I guess somehow, a day that I have always cherished since my birth, isn't so "happy" this year.

For weeks, people have asked me "what would you like to do on your birthday?"

My family has been bugging me, "what you like to eat on your birthday?"

I'm yet to answer. It's my birthday.

I'm at home getting ready to clean and then work out and then maybe I'll call Andrew or Janelle and turn my phone on and take the world for what it's worth once again.

I've never had a birthday funk like this. But I truly believe that the release of Nasia is bothering me the most... that was my best friend! Leon's deceit and lies only mirror the fact that nothing was real. Ever.

...and as much as I value my lambs, and Andrew, and Janelle...

somehow the double-whammy of losing two people I had so much love for remains...and I just want it to be done with...

I'm sure that turning on the iPod and cleaning will pre-occupy my time, but in the meantime...

Happy Birthday to me.

Thank you for the wishes this year, but I miss one person most this year and it would only make me the happiest to have Nasia back in my life..

that's a candle I won't count on blowing out though.

j ry

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